Review - BODY #19 (Thai)
- Ethan Cole
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In a cluster-fuck of rip-offs comes the latest Thai horror movie with the promise of stellar visual effects. It’s the story of a dumbass (yet somehow a med student) who is haunted through a series of convoluted events, by the typical J-Horror styled Asian ghost-bitch that thinks tormenting a person is a good way to get them to help.
Compared to RE3; this is much less boring.
The primary attraction for this movie is the visual effects, which look excellent in the trailers. In the actual movie however, they’re disappointing. Some of them flat out suck, looking unfinished and in a few instances half-assed; such as a generic lens-flare that comes with some photo editing applications like Photoshop. It’s not helped that the whole movie looks as if it was shot with HDV cameras at 1080i and upscaled, then slapped onto 35mm.
The effects in most instances look blurred so much so that it doesn’t fit into the shot naturally or plausibly, and at times some of the effects seem as if they weren’t properly locked off – a lot of tweaking and additional keyframe work needed. Perhaps the sloppiest scenes are the green screen driving sequences, despite the argument that it’s supposed to be dream like, there’s some reflections on the side-mirrors that could have been eliminated to remedy this [possible] intent. The worst effects sequence is pretty much the one featured at the high point of the trailer; essentially a Silent Hill rip-off demon-bitch that erupts into tiny fragments of demon-fluff. In addition to this mess is a series of shit-slow-motion segments which were clearly decided upon in post – almost as if it was done after the FX team returned the completed footage and the director decided he wanted to do something more with it – without knowing what he was doing.
As for the other shots that are weaker than in the trailer is the museum sequence consisting of tentacle-esque barbed wires and weird buttflies flowing forth to torment an ‘actress’ who cant act or react worth shit (possibly/most likely the directors fault). So regardless of the quality of the effects it doesn’t come across as the least bit believable, which is a shame because it’s one of the best effects sequences in the movie. Here’s an instance where sound design would’ve helped some.
There are some decent nuances to be found, albeit really in your face, of a sequence involving preserved dead animals ‘coming to life’ – the eye’s opening, snakes shifting in a jar, the usual. It looks good, generates some degree of unease but is pretty much there for show, much like things are in a museum, as it’s clearly obvious that they’re not going to break out and attack the helpless dumbass.
The worst offender is with the audio, a fuck up of rookie proportions. INT. CAR – The rain is too damn loud, so the actors have to yell; which results in a tinny sound and maxing out the levels. Red lights are bad. Too much effort to ADR the annoying melodrama perhaps… However the issue crops up in several instances… funnily enough all involving the sister. It could just be her voice and acting annoyed the sound guy so much he thought about killing himself the whole time rather than doing his job… that poor bastard – should dock his pay – shit comes with the territory. Thankfully the sound for the rest of the picture is fine, nothing special or daring… for the most part passable.
Much like a lot of Thai cinema, it’s a series of copies and rip-offs from other movies (there’s even a stolen Lord of the Rings shot in the trailer) but the Silent Hill theft is almost overkill, from the similar tunes of the soundtrack, to the opening theme – which to no surprise plays a significant role. Other than being overly fucking repetitive to the point of a tumor forming in my frontal lobe where that god-damn song repeats over and over and over and over, it compliments the opening effects sequence; a fly-through of part of a digital recreation of Bangkok, down into the sewers and transitioning smoothly into the live action interior. Nicely done. This is essentially the best part of the movie, inclusive of the excellent animation of the demon cat (who ironically is the best actor here).
The acting for the protagonist Chon, is passable; acting scared and surprised enough that it’s evident he’s reacting to the digital effects – over all it’s like TV melodrama (think USA TV) – additionally the script doesn’t allow for much range.
The way its shot is serviceable, but the subject matter is domestic fluff - that isn’t otherwise intriguing, especially given his mental state doesn’t really have much effect in his day to day life... which we never see (which sort of makes sense in a 'movie' sort of way). In some ways it comes together nicely despite being predictable, but thankfully not as predictable to the point of being laughably generic. Unfortunately by the time the reveals are out the way it’s all too stupid for someone to actually give a toss. Even worse is the ghost-bitch was an actual bitch before she died; further reducing any reason to care… Even if you had yellow fever she’s not in the slightest bit attractive which makes her ghostly incarnation the aesthetic edge… maybe if you’re into gothic-trannies you she may appear remotely attractive, have fun with that thought.
Such bitchery is extended into her teaching through the use of ‘power-of-suggestion’ on one of the bimbo-brat students in her psychology lecture. The sequence features the worst of the sloppy visual-effects tracking and is tainted even more by being a bore to watch. Although it does end up with the girl literally pissing herself in terror, running out the room crying her eyes out. But again; no reason to care… not enough even to laugh even though this gives some insight to the life of the ghost-bitch. To add even less reason to care; the ghost bitch tries to blackmail Suthee with pictures she took of them in bed, which she kindly informs him of through e-mail, which effectively makes the dramatic burning of the photographs (also seen in the trailer) fucking retarded.
The plot entails of the ghost-bitch trying to get Chon (through scaring/haunting) to help "Find Her". He tries to "find her" in a very episodic way - through structured reveals by the ghost-bitch of past memories and a front row seat for the killings, which are mostly CSI styled - butcher wise. The prosthetic make up looks pretty good for the most part, but are instantly laughable in the trash-horror-movie style; which can’t be taken seriously, especially when it comes to eyes popping out and raining acid on the victim.
[spoilers]
The structure is pretty poor, as the whole thing would be over quicker if he was actually determined to 'solve' the mystery, simply by pushing the cupboard out of the way - which he tries doing at one point, but shortly his sister tells him "it's not our house you cant move stuff around" he gives up, then heads off; determined to prove his visions are real. It becomes obvious that Chon is the killer; however after this reveal - it's later revealed that he's got a split personality. As it turns out he’s Suthee; who’s assumed Chon’s personality after he was murdered. Evidently this assumed identity is direct result of the ghost-bitch’s emphasis on the importance of her brother: Chon.
He discovers his upon examining the cadaver locker: Corpse #19 in the morgue - C.O.D.: Blood loss. Even in light of this reveal, the seemingly disjointed acting of some of the principle characters doesn’t improve; it just comes off a little less stupid. Speaking of stupid, the reveals keep coming in waves; in such a way as to beat the explanation into the thick solid skulls of the masses of idiot filmgoers. Which given the base demographic is understandable, but far from forgivable.
Suthee’s mental state isn’t really explained, but rather glossed over in a long winded court session "he's got MPD, and this is what MPD is - look at our diagram here, see..." At which point the judge "postpones the trial until a later date - after he's healed"... Can Thai law be this much of a joke? (actual enforcement aside). Furthermore, he's killed roughly 5 people, and he's not even shackled in transport. This is convenient as it allows him to burst out the doors onto the road right in front of a truck timed just right, to get hit by metal construction rods.
Yet another revelation indicates that the person he was supposed to find isn’t the ghost-bitch. The name given was that of the unborn baby. The ghost-bitch evidently cursed him, moments before she passed out from the spiked grape-juice-looking-wine, that every time he hears “this [theme] song” he’ll think of her. So we’re treated to yet another round of audio fun; listening to this constipated build-up of annoyance that is a song again. My tumor; ready to burst through my cranium dance a jig and fucking kill everyone in the audience. The cool part though, is when he's chopping her up and finds the fetus inside. Whilst I can’t attest to its biological accuracy, I can state that it is a hysterical sight.
[/spoilers]
Pretty much all the 'scary' stuff is shown in the trailer, actually everything; Frodo shot, that-time-of-the-month-pussy-cat, crawling fetuses, bad-hair-day-bitch, going-to-get-struck-by-many-metal-
poles-to-final-destination-guy, etc. This adversely affects the movie (which already seems too long; seemingly over 2 hours) as when watching the movie, the audience is essentially just waiting for the next pre-established part to be shown.
The pacing is worsened given they don’t know when to end the movie, the directors name comes up, then, the movie continues with a sequence and then up come credits come up. It's not as many endings as Return of the King, but it’s just as annoying.
The editing of this movie is somewhat film-school-like; as is the set design at times, though for the most part it appears like something from a TV show, whilst other sections are like a commercial. The suspense horror is the same generic staples from other horror movies.
The English subtitles were pretty good aside from a few amusing slip ups such as:
- "Fine Me!": as opposed to "Find Me" - although it's unintelligible in Thai, since it’s screamed in shit-horror fashion
- "Woos": "Wuss" (clearly a correction by a computer spell check program)
It should also be noted, that the subtitles were 'cleaner' than the actual dialog, but this is only for a few scenes.
There is no real reason to bother with this unless you’re into cultural shock and delving into the strange world of cluster-fuck amalgamations of other peoples work.
Recommended For:
- The easily cultural shocked
- Yellow fever types who have a hard-on for Asian horror
Alternate Viewing:
- The Shutter (original Thai version)
- Silent Hill
Rating: 4.5/10
Cumjackulation Rating: 5.0/10
(ratings explained)